here’s yet another way you can tell you live in a shithole country: it’s when your Acting Secretary of the Navy pretty much has his job because Dear Leader is a child who giggled over his name.
yesterday, John Phelan got fired as Navy Secretary, and his second in command took over. his name? Hung Cao.
the first thing you need to know is that our overgrown toddler president thinks the name ‘Hung Cao’ is super fucking hilarious.
“It’s really an honor to be with you,” Trump said with Cao to his right. “Thank you. And we’re gonna be with this man. This is a great gentleman. I love his name — Hung Cao. I love that name. And that name alone should get you elected, right?”
spoiler alert: Hung Cao’s name didn’t get him elected in 2024, because Hung Cao is a fucking crackpot who ran for Senate because, quite frankly, somebody needed to do something about all these witches.
“there’s a place in Monterey, California called Lovers Point. the original name was Lovers of Christ Point. but now they took out the Christ, it’s become Lovers Point — really, Monterey is a really dark place now, a lot of witchcraft and the wiccan community has really taken over there, and we can’t let that happen in Virginia.”
Hung Cao seems sane, doesn’t he?
and because Donny has a knack for always being able to find the worst person possible for each job, he plucked Wytchfinder Cao from the shitpile of failure and made him his Undersecretary of the Navy.
for once in his entire stupid life, Donny didn’t hire a flunkie because he looked good on Fox News. no, he this time picked the dude whose name makes him think of a big-dick bovine.
and now, Cao — the scourge of witches from Monterey to Virginia — is our Acting Secretary of the Navy.
because shitty timelines don’t become shitty timelines all by themselves