Mostly corporations.

You mean the pot of coffee with a few gnats in it that Pedro left out overnight?

They squirted some Torani Pumpkin in it and put some Sonic ice on top. It’s now 12$.

Vitriol towards office environments and their overlords aside for a minute, here are a few of the positives the company gets from this:

There is wicked amounts of prestige in having a complex with your name on the marquee of the building. Client confidence skyrockets if you “Have a building” in a major metro.

Less ability for overemployment - you can guarantee the guy unable to get this one job finished at the office isn’t selling his spare time to the competition down the road.

More control over employee’s personal lives and psyche - if you can DEMAND that Mr. Jones be in the office instead of at his kid’s parent day lunch, and you have the building to DEMAND he report to, you’ve driven home the point to Mr. Jones that you own his life, and he is an accessory of your money making venture first, then a family man second. This can sometimes lead to the creation of unhealthy work-lifers who are extremely profitable to the firm. This is almost impossible to do when they’re at home and the oppression is harder to enforce.

It can actually be more cost effective, if you’re a large enough firm. Once you pass about 40-50 members, there are instances where you can save on things like data connectivity, equipment costs, and travel to trainings/client meetings. These costs vary wildly by industry, so the fiscal math follows suit. In many cases, it’s a cost-saving measure.

There are other factors - tax breaks, stipends from cities to occupy certain districts, nepotism, and social optics, but those are adjunct to the main purpose of getting employees back into a high-rise.

My commute is 0 seconds in the morning. I wake up, get rolling on my morning routine, open up my Surface, and log in to the morning meeting. I am productive instantly, and start on my workload within 30 minutes of being awake. I often finish everything needed of my department within 2.5-5 hours, with extra time to improve or fuss over details to enhance the client’s deliverable or improve UI or something.

Meanwhile, my in-office peers at other firms are just getting settled into their desks after their 2nd mandatory in-person attendance huddle meeting, sometime around 10:30 in the morning. Of course, this is followed by waiting 45 minutes in queue to pay 10$ for burnt old coffee at the cafeteria, and shuffling around a maze of corridors and 2 different elevators for 15 minutes just to get to their assigned desk for the day. Oh, and that’s after their key card for elevator 2 desync’d, so there’s been an hour of waiting around for Jan from Facilities to approve Todd from IT’s request for an authorization on a new key card, and a 40$ pay deduction from the employee for missing a key card in the first place. Of course, that’s in addition to the demerit for missing their 3rd in-person attendance huddle of the morning. By the time lunch hour hits, they’re finally logged in to their machine with just enough give-a-fuck left to sneak in Facebook memes when their manager isn’t over them looming; all while giving enough shits to ignore their actual workload because they hate it there.

Gotta put meat in the seats or the megaconglomerate who owns the 17 office buildings downtown might have to rethink a portion of one of their income models. Less demand for high end commercial real estate when the companies they lease to realize/ follow through on the fact 90% of them do not need the 28,000 Sq ft bullying zone they use to oppress and keep motivation and salaries low in order to function.

Plus, the cruelty and waste is the point. Also, there’s the miserable middle manager rung of humanity that only lives to make their office coworkers lick their boot by prisoner compliance who are rabid to establish the facade of purpose in their career. They don’t care if the planet, all their coworker’s families, and their company’s bottom line have to suffer for that - if they can’t loom over their underlings and slow progress with tons of detrimental comments and stupid suggestions, how will the world know they’re ‘involved’?

I’m overly grateful my firm is 100% remote. Damn.

But if you end up falling in love with whatever it is you’re good at… You’d better hire an accountant.

Ah, to be young and -6 years old again

I’m still waiting for the opportunity to strike where I can get a Grandmother. Especially in light of the buyout. Get the good stuff while it’s possible to. Cherish it and build a good relationship with a repair shop.

Yanggang is still around, but it’s not looking likely we’re getting any kind of party nomination. I think it’s microwaved Bidem for dinner this round.

I’m holding out for the Jeep Recon.