I was just talking about this for my fiance last night. I can guarantee you that it won’t be long after the election that he will have suddenly died in the hospital. My opinion is that he’s probably just being kept on life support, brain dead.

The post-Civil War south is why we have the prison labor system we have. Abraham Lincoln was too busy being dead to stop defacto slavery being implemented to the benefit of the loosing side.

Well this shit ain’t gonna cook itself.

I dunno, what does Mark Twain have to do with time travel? The universe is a weird fuckin place, it’s easier to just roll with it.

I’m not going to lie, if tea put me in a dreamless sleep for 12-24 hours, I would actually drink it no matter how vile it tastes.

DAD! HEY DAD! Can you name something after me?

The price of not caring about so sportsball: free.

Hey if you’re with somebody who likes to do stuff that you don’t that’s your choice.

I love the weight lifting robot that freaks out like C-3PO.

You can usually get rid of ghosts by giving your ventilation system a tune-up anyway.

Not even enough missiles to justify the military budget and win a stupid war. It’s like we’re not even trying anymore.

He’s the kid that breaks the toys in daycare so nobody else can play with them.

I had this problem. I used their online tool to see if I could move my service to the new place, and it said the location wasn’t covered. I still had to call them and cancel by phone. I had to wait for them to determine whether or not the location was covered in that location even though I told them their automated system had already confirmed that it was not. I had to sit through their goddamn scripted bullshit until my account was finally canceled.

Edit: just so many typos + clarification lol. I must have written this while half asleep.

Farscape called currency… Currency…

What do you mean that I put the anvil up there? Do I look strong enough to lift that thing?

Pfft, amateur.

That she wants to go bowling, clearly.

Trump: grass has a life like humans have a life - virtually worthless and there to be stepped on.

Especially the red ones.

Naw that’s my cousin. Distant cousin.