So a dollar more than a banana

David plowie

Call them what they are: chicken nuggets

I described an NFL game without the express written consent of NFL productions

Existential dread

Love a good compromise

I got a 7 day ban for saying you haven’t served your life sentence until you are dead, they said that was promoting violence, I decided if they rejected my appeal it could only mean they don’t actually read appeals and I should just leave.

Don’t worry, tomorrow the head of officiating will explain why we are all wrong.

Workout timer that wants a subscription

You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals so let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel

Soon he will sign an executive order that there are three states of matter. Then one that there are two kingdoms of life.