That was a fascinating read and thank you for sharing. If it is any good, I’ll be thinking about this for a long time.

What did they do to you?!

Same man, where do these people get their flashlights

Edit: Thank you for the countless tips on where you guys buy flashlights. But neither am I in the USA nor do I actually ever need a flashlight. I have two at home and I don’t think I ever actually used them for other than fun. I guess the follow up question is what do you do with all those flashlights?

I agree, but there are plenty of jobs that cannot be done in home office. During covid years I commuted like crazy (by train though) because I worked in a lab developing antiretrovirals. Even the project managers in biotech/pharma need to be on site especially in intense times (like covid) to be able to be in the lab. There are tons of jobs (isn’t it 50%?) that cannot be done from home office. We need a strong public transport either way.

As a side note: The stupidest form of work is hybrid. So you still have to live relatively close to work to be able to commute, i.e. likely in an expensive metropolitan area, and pay higher rent prices because you need a working room, and the room is not fully tax deductible because you theoretically could be in the office (at least in Germany they deduct 6€/day for voluntary home office). It’s a shame we don’t have much more and much cheaper coworking spaces. They should be literally everywhere so you don’t need to go further than 15 minutes.

Literally the first person I thought of when reading the title of this post

We use the little mole for brushing teeth, but our kid is a bit younger. However, I don’t remember a time in my life where I would not enjoy that little fella. You have videos from 5 (most) to 30 minutes (2) on youtube. There is no speech too.

Dude I was born in the early 90s and even I assumed “Pagers” was something I am not familiar with when I read the news. The name of a city? A guy? Some ethnic group? Some new military car? At some point I thought the news outlet just meant Prague (especially since I read it in German news first). I never would have guessed they literally meant pagers. Took me like 2 news report headlines and 4 mentions on lemmy to be like “oh wait what for real?!”

I once worked with a colleague within an academic setting for a EU wide project. We were understaffed. She constantly complained about how she works extra hours at home and on weekends. Well, my problem was she wouldn’t let me work at work because she used at least 5 hours of the day to trash talk colleagues behind their back (including me when I was on sick leave or, probably, out to pee). Damn I wonder why she had to work that much after working hours.

Two days ago I wrote an overly sarcastic comment but it was late at night and apparently I both made it sound too realistic and didn’t put an /s - I didn’t think anyone would think anyone could be that stupid.

Turns out a lot of people assumed I seriously thought that my fictional dog’s vets were more likely to suggest euthanasia if they are Asian because I believed they used the corpses for meat and handed me fake ashes. I’ll definitely make sure to use /s in the future now. To both avoid looking like a racist conspiracy theorist and a dog owner.

Same, I hate muscles and fat on guys. Although that’s difficult to admit openly since a guy saying he is into heroine chic would be a social outcast, so why should it be acceptable if a woman says so. I like skinny guys and my husband is skinny af. I am by no means unattractive either.

My question to OP is - you seem to get rejected because of your looks, yet these beautiful women (by your standards) went out with you in the first place if I read that correctly. So there must have been some attraction in the beginning. At the very least they talked to you. But something along the line happened that made them not want to commit to you.

In general, we find people attractive because we like them. We don’t like them because we find them attractive.

It can very well happen that when you meet someone in your everyday life and get to know them and then happen to fall in love, they absolutely don’t fall into your “scheme” or “type”.

Also, everything seems to have to be a gift now. Can’t just buy a thing and give it to them. It has to wait to be a present. Or maybe that’s just my wife.

We specifically don’t wait for holidays to give things we want to gift to our daughter (soon to be 3). On her birthday in two weeks she will get a book, a plush animal, and a second hand peppa pig puzzle (I hate peppa pig but she loves it and she doesn’t even know there is a show). That’s it, but she gets many things throughout the year. My husband hates holidays and celebrations, I think that’s where this feeling of “let’s please not make a huge stock of presents to give her twice a year” came from. And it is so much less pressure to find “the perfect gift”.

And you can get rid of things much more easily. I don’t know about you, but if I got a bad birthday present, I tend to keep it, because it was a birthday present. Same for children’s stuff. She got that for her first birthday feels different than she got that when she was around 14 months. Somehow it’s less sentimental, and I am an awfully sentimental and nostalgic person, so this saves my ass.

Another point is that can change interests so quickly. I would not dare to buy her something peppa pig themed right now for Christmas or plan ahead for her 4th birthday. Or let’s say she needs a new bike - why would I wait until the end of summer to give it to her just because it’s her birthday.

But talk to me again on September 9th, I usually get very sad that we don’t celebrate with a crap ton of presents and decorations and a big party right before her birthday.

I thought Munich was bad (lived there and in its suburbs for most of my life) but I recently moved to Leipzig. Jesus Christ.

Oof that would have hit me too. But I guess the older the become the more common it will be. At some point we’ll go to more funerals than birthday parties. My whole card system will need to be reworked then.

As for cards - I’ve now developed the habit of writing a text once a year and using it basically for everybody (slightly modified if necessary). Bonus points for a kid and a grown up version. Btw I also have the same standard text for weddings and funerals (these stay the same over the years). Most of my friends don’t know each other and will never find out.

I also started to just wish very mundane things because it sounds poetic and I have wished them the same Big Things for years. No one ever congratulated me when I wished them happiness and health, but when I wish them the most colorful flowers on the roadside and warm summer rain on sun exhausted skin, and the occasional mindfulness to take the time to stop and appreciate these small moments everyone loses their shit. Sometimes something negative is also appreciated. Think you still got so many years ahead of you. Your path will in some parts be straightforward, but will make you stumble and fall in other parts. For the latter I wish you a helping hand to get up again and some colorful band aids

As a side note, I am more proud of my sincere go to when someone dies. Especially old people. Because I always point out that they don’t need to excuse the death or downplay it because someone was old or it was predictable. Losing a person who you cared about, no matter how old or sick, is always painful and a big loss. And no matter how predictable it was, their death and your grief always end up taking you by surprise. And I wish everyone who lost someone the support necessary to have some time granted for their grief and pain. .

I used to get ukrainian emails every now and then. And then once I got a “confirm your signature to the petition” email and I checked. It was a petition to allow men to leave the country. A girl with my name signed it (wanted to sign it), and she stated wanting to leave with her 58 year old dad as the reason.

I ended up signing the petition myself, stating I wanted XY to leave with her dad as the reason.

I still wish there was a way to get in touch with her. I guess it was the same person who every now and then signed up for newsletters etc. I hope they found a way to leave. I wish there was a way I could help her directly. I keep imagining it was me and my dad stuck in a war torn country. My father has a super popular first name so the chances aren’t even that low that our dads share the same name too.

Interesting. Their la rosetta pizza has beef, arugula and parmesan as toppings btw.

In German, rosetta is a slang for butthole and whenever I hear Rosetta Stone I imagine a kidney stone trapped in an anus.

My favorite pizzeria is also called rosetta and it grosses me out but I have accepted that them stamping every pizza with their butthole is justified if it makes that good of a pizza.

Serious question: How does a trial separation work with a child? I remember having a divorce scare when I was little and it still haunts me. I can’t imagine telling my kid “well we are separated now because we want to try out how it would be if we divorced” and letting it live through that limbo of uncertainty. Even if we get back together - that will they won’t they seems to be too much to bear for a child. We are always told to be clear and consistent with our kids and this is definitely the opposite of it.

I find it more impressive that someone decided to name their sons dick and butt

Same. My partner needs his quiet time and alone time and just a spouse and child (I am the primary caregiver) is so overwhelming. I never expected to become the parent of an only child, I felt like just me and my sister was so little when I was growing up. But now this is what I am stuck with. Just one child and a spouse I hardly interact with because it’s too much and meditation and peace and quiet is making them more happy than time spent together.