Basically, I can’t figure out the appeal or Tiktok and other types of repetitive media consumption where you are doing the same thing over and over and over. I remember trying it out and just being so bored and frustrated with the entire thing.
I feel the same way about TV shows, and restaurants and all that too. Going to the same place every Friday night and getting the same order and watching the same TV show on repeat just sounds like hell to me.
Or hanging out and talking about the same topics over and over and over, with never a new or novel thing to say, drinking the same beer/wine/cocktail over and over.
What is the appeal of living this way?
i also don’t get tiktok and tv shows, but then again most people probably don’t get how i browse lemmy every day. ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯
I read once that toddlers enjoy watching the same movie over and over again because they have little to no control over their lives, and a limited ability to understand what is happening to them, or to predict what is going to happen next, because of their limited experience. Watching the same comfort movie repeatedly gives them a sense of control because they know what’s going to happen next, and how they’re supposed to react to it. So, maybe that but for adults?
Edit: I read this back and it comes off very “people who like repetitive content because they have the intellect of toddlers” but I meant it more as a “we’re seeing a (perceived) rise in the popularity of repetitive content because people feel like they don’t have control over their own lives anymore.”
That makes sense. Yes, I noticed folks in my life who i was close to who did this sort of stuff… often felt overwhelmed with their lives and terrified of the unknown. And they found interacting with me super frustrating because I was not predictable in the way they desired and my constant introduction of novelty to their own life seemed to upset them constantly.
they found interacting with me super frustrating because I was not predictable in the way they desired and my constant introduction of novelty to their own life seemed to upset them constantly.
The way you wrote this made me remember a person who was in my life for a bit. She had like 1000% more energy than I did, she was a complete extroverted duracell bunny while I’m more slow moving introvert. She kept pushing me to try new things and dragging me to places where I didn’t want to go. She had no sense of boundaries. She’d show up and just start doing stuff and telling me how I was being boring and scared of living life. Just because I wanted to do my thing in my own pace.
She was exhausting. I’d have to be alone for days after spending half a day with that hurricane of a life force that she was. Eventually I had to cut her out of my life. I stopped opening the door when the door bell rang. I still don’t open the door if the bell rings lmao.
She didn’t mean anything bad, she was just completely clueless about how to read others. I could have dealt with her if she had like 20% less energy. But she didn’t and I couldn’t. I hope shes doing well.
Anyway, people just are different. Please don’t try to force your way of doing things on others. Its not because they are scared or have trouble dealing with life, its because they are doing things differently.
It goes both ways. I am frustrated and exhausted and depressed by folks who never want to try anything new or change, who never want to get out of their comfort zone. It feels like dragging around dead weight and sucks the joy out of life.
Why do you feel its your job to drag them out of their comfort zones? Why do you feel the need to change people and force them to do what they dont want to do?
It doesn’t go both ways, you can just walk away and stop bothering them. If you keep pestering them, they are just gonna get fed up with you and break contact. If they are people you want to keep as your friends, find some other friends who are on your energy and interest levels and use your extra energy with them and use your chilling and relaxing days with the people who are comfortable sitting at the comfort of their homes.
Experiencing and doing familiar things are ways for people to relax and be comfortable.
Flow states are another thing.
Being in flow is energizing and relaxing.
It is accomplishing something and feeling like your life in this moment has value and purpose. It’s crowding out all of the rest of the outside world to accomplish a specific thing.
Repetitive tasks that you are very good at, that accomplish something, are very good for getting into flow states and therefore improving your happiness.
I have no problem whatsoever with how you choose to live your life. Go get that happiness, brotha.
Or hanging out and talking about the same topics over and over and over, with never a new or novel thing to say, drinking the same beer/wine/cocktail over and over.
We were his two students and, very early on, while we were practicing in his backyard (he had no school, he had just agreed to teach us) we asked our martial art teacher what was the interest in repeating the same move over and over again instead of learning different ones. He told us that if we were really feeling that we were repeating the exact same move this meant he was failing as a teacher. That day, I realized how deeply ingrained and how wrong my very own preconceptions could be.
Obviously, martial art is not endless chatting but you get the idea: there may be something valuable to get out of seemingly repetitive and monotonous activities.
On a more general note, like already mentioned in the comments, doing repetitive things is an easy way to relax.
My health being what it is, I’m much less into intense physical activities than when I wanted to learn martial art, but I still do enjoy long walks, daily long walks. Walking is a very repetitive task, it’s just putting one foot in front of the other, sometimes for a couple hours or more. Still, doing it helps me feel so much better than not just putting one foot in front of the other for a few hours. I would not want to stop doing such seemingly boring and uninteresting task ;)
As for chatting with friends. It’s called socializing, provided one keeps it under tight control (it should not become the end-all be-all of one’s activities) it’s also an important part.
Comfort, predictability, familiarity, routine, not needing to think about it or make decisions, catharsis, not needing to pay attention and being able to zone out, actually enjoying the thing itself and not getting tired of it when repeated, fear of trying something new, fear of mistakes or choosing wrong…
Sometimes I like to try something new, go on an adventure, experience novel stimuli. Other times, I just want to exist, or I want to comfort of something familiar.
Do you never repeat something? Are there hobbies that you enjoy that require repetition to progress? I enjoy painting miniatures, and I like trying new techniques or finding new (types) of models to paint, but in order to improve my skill I need to do the same or similar things over and over. If you also have a hobby that you return to, there’s part of your answer why people will do the same thing - they enjoy it. You don’t have to enjoy what they enjoy, and I’m sure they don’t enjoy everything you do.
No. I like trying new things.
I’m talking about people who are allergic to challenge, progression, any sort of change and often view it as threatening. Like for years they have done the same things with the same people, never ever changing the routine.
People have different personalities and preferences. You might as well ask why some people like to eat certain things while others hate it.
Because it is comfortable for them, it is familiar, it is safe. It definitely is sad when people don’t try to experience new things, and it almost definitely gets them stuck in a rut. But that’s what they want.
Not having (persistent) hobbies isn’t much different than only ever doing the same thing. There is plenty “new” to experience by improving a skill in something, just as much as trying something new at only the surface level.
comfort
