My elementary school teacher told us once that Americans only poop once a week. The climate is colder in North America, so their intestines pack the poop together very densely such that they only need to poop once a week. She said you’d be sent to the doctor if you poop daily in America.

Is this true?

  • jobbies@lemmy.zip
    9·
    1 day ago

    Common misconception. They only poop when Trump tells them to. If they don’t wait til instructed ICE comes and shoots them.

    Land of the free, ladies and gents.

  • Adulated_Aspersion@lemmy.world
    6·
    1 day ago

    On the off chance that this is a real question:

    I am an American, and I poop regularly, every day.

    I will admit that I do not adhere to the standard American diet, but I know that I am not alone in my poop habits.

    I genuinely don’t understand the logic of “America is a colder climate”, because that is ostensibly incorrect.

    • VitoRobles@lemmy.todayEnglish
      3·
      2 days ago

      Having worked in fentanyl crisis towns and then have the neighboring towns proudly proclaim how great America is and how much FREEDOM we have… Totally understandable how Europeans look at us.

      Hell, I’ll never forget the look my european coworker gave me when I told them we have a two week parental leave and it’s a fire-at-will state.

      • Soulg@ani.socialEnglish
        1·
        20 hours ago

        Yeah but that’s us being oppressed, I would think it makes sense they find those things abhorrent. But not really the same thing

        If an American had thought something as ridiculous as the OP about some other country (and genuinely no offense meant to the OP) they would get destroyed

  • Resonosity@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
    9·
    2 days ago

    Nope. I shit every day, in the morning, on a schedule.

    Your teacher was full of shit. Sure the Standard American Diet (SAD) is terrible and leaves fiber much to be desired, but not every American sticks to the SAD. I’m sure other countries have people that have shit diets and get constipated too, not just the US.

    Generalizations don’t help anyone.

  • belunos@lemmus.orgEnglish
    261·
    2 days ago

    Are you still in elementary school? If not, you can’t possibly still believe this

  • MrsDoyle@sh.itjust.worksEnglish
    7·
    2 days ago

    All this (wonderful) shit-talking and no-one has mentioned painkillers. Earlier this year I spent a couple of weeks in hospital along with a lot of other oldies with fall injuries. We were all taking oxycodone and paracetamol for the pain, and the nurses were obsessed with our bowel movements. We were given laxatives twice a day to hurry things along, and threatened with an enema if we went too long without pooing. After the laxatives worked their magic on me I started refusing to take them, because it took me so long to get across the ward to the toilet I was scared I’d shit myself halfway.

    So yes, painkillers are costive.

    • MrShankles@reddthat.com
      5·
      2 days ago

      I had to take oxy’s after hand surgery, and I am not accustomed to painkillers. I ended up constipated, and it was (BY FAR) the worst poop of my life. Like, that (literal) shit hurt worse than the pain of surgery

      I’m talking 45+ mins on the toilet; pushing, sweating, almost crying, standing up and down trying to get things to move. I became a little fearful and wondered if I was about to tear my rectum. I felt like I wanted to faint. I couldn’t just stop because it was half-way out, making my bum feel like I was getting spread-open by a dragon or something… and it wouldn’t pinch off. I admittedly dug in my butt, trying to pull it out… I was in fucking shambles and beginning to panic. It felt like I was fighting for my life

      It finally cleared, and I was left with pure exhaustion and butt pain. Prune juice helped me to reconcile that issue, and even though I had never tried prune juice — I’m a “forever fan” of that sweet sweet elixir of preemptive relief

      I’ll never forget that poop

    • Apytele@sh.itjust.works
      4·
      2 days ago

      Cleaning you is waaay easier than disimpaction. If it’s bad enough I have to call someone who doesn’t work holidays, weekends, or any other hour a bank isn’t open. If it’s NOT bad enough to call that person, that’s actually way worse because it’s gonna be you, me, and these phalanges, and neither of us is gonna be having a good time. Now that I work in a tiny community hospital I don’t even have residents I can sucker into it anymore!

      • MrShankles@reddthat.com
        2·
        2 days ago

        “Shhh shhhh shhhhh… you’ll feel better soon, I promise”. And they do! (Then my shift ends, and I think about my life choices)

        I was never taught disimpaction in school… but when you know it’s gotta happen, it just is what it is