Wall-E: school shooter edition

But it would really good right at the end before you peace out

Maybe it is a hair on your screen because I’m not seeing what you’re seeing.

Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat, otherwise we get along 🎵

My husband was a champ. He worked full-time and also stayed up at night manually pumping my breast milk while I was sleeping, and he’d wake up with th baby & fed the baby & changed diapers & he cooked meals too! The only thing he didn’t do is clean and that’s okay cuz I loved cleaning.

Ok so tell us what parilla means.

Dr bampop, please advise how to exterminate our ocular spider infestation.

Aw hell no. I trauma dump on everyone who asks me “How are you?”

Sounds like you haven’t heard of the “Dave Chappelle was murdered & cloned” conspiracy theory. I recommend going down that rabbit hole.

According to this theory, the last time the real DC was ever seen was on the Oprah Winfrey Show a couple decades ago. Around that time the entertainment industry moguls were dangling a multi-million dollar offer in front of him but he saw right through it & saw the manipulative corruption in the stipulations proposed in the contract and he declined the offer.

He left on a solo vacation to Africa to escape the public eye & clear his mind, and when he came back he allegedly quietly went back to revisit the multi-million dollar offer but still wouldn’t conform with their demands so…

here’s where shit gets weird, consider yourself warned:

They took him down to an underground cloning lab, harvested his DNA etc to create their idea of the ideal Dave Chappelle who would appease both audience & industry, for purposes of financial gain for entertainment industry moguls & to keep audiences complacently entertained. Cloning complete, they murdered the original Dave Chapelle.

The DC we see now has a deeper voice, ripped huge muscular body, makes less controversial comedy than before, while still captivating audiences* & bringing in revenue for the entertainment industry moguls which is all they want him for.

*His most intelligent discerning fans know this isn’t the real DC, and those closest to him, friends & family & close colleagues, have repeatedly reported that the current DC is NOT the same person they used to know. Literally a completely different person.

Some boys have just the right combination of curiosity, mischief, carelessness, & lack of self-preservation instincts.

Technically the truth

Are you suggesting that Yoga is “woowoo?”

It’s a fucking excellent physical workout & emotionally therapeutic when you find the right teachers. And there are plenty of excellent teachers.

Wait, really? I might actually qualify ♥️ BRB, filling out an application to be in an elitist discriminatory sex cult 😄

Edit: nvm, I don’t meet their tallness specifications 😥

That means you DO understand the post.

I’m gonna go stalk through your profile to find out if you’re really a pigeon or not. BRB…

I’m Gen X and off the top of my head, isn’t Jonathan Swift the guy who wrote Gulliver’s Travels? Out of principle I’m not going to look it up to verify whether or not I’m correct.

I hope those pubic head hair hairstyles never come back into fashion but I think kids call it broccoli cut now 🤢

Hello, I consider myself somewhat of an armchair expert when it comes to zooming in to read small print, and typos stand out to me like neon lights. I’d like to draw everyone’s attention to:

Heehee looks like writer got an editing hiccup.

As his pistol began to take shape

As his pistol begins to take shape

As his pistol begans to take shape

Welp, apparently high schools have always been shooting ranges, only the format evolves over time 🫣

Did anyone ever disclose which drugs he was under the influence of when making those shows? Those shows were bizarre & disturbing & uncomfortable & felt so low-budget, even to relatively undiscerning 6-year-old me.