I think the “oh, fuck, that was an invitation!” moment several minutes/hours after the fact is one of the most universal moments.
Years.
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One time a girl invited me to sleep with her, and I looked at her filthy pillowcases and bullshitted my way into sleeping on her couch, after countering her insistence with the extreme option of “if you’re not gonna let me sleep on your couch, I’m going home.”
I thought she literally meant actual sleep, and what she wanted was sex.
I slept on her couch and she sobbed softly through a closed door.
I found out about a decade later, from a mutual friend, that girl had the biggest hots for me and was gonna stop at nothing to fuck me.
Well, she was stopped by my obliviousness.
I was ace and sex-repulsed even back then, so even if I had figured her out, I prolly would have had a small panic attack and tried to go home.
I once lost interest in a girl because she said was into this new cartoon “South Park” which I thought was stupid despite never having watched it. Years later I actually watched it and realized it wasn’t stupid at all. Sometimes the real treasure was the utter stupidity you made along the way.
Yup. The first one I remember is a concert where I went to see the opener and didn’t much care for the main act. While I was on the floor during the opening act, I was next to a girl who seemed similarly enthused about that band. We definitely both noticed each other fangirling over this relatively unknown opening act. Then, afterward, I bumped into her on the balcony while the main act was playing, and she’s like “these guys kinda suck right? I think I’m gonna head out and get a drink at $nearby_bar”. And I totally missed the hint.
I just now realized this girl may have been interested in me 11 years ago. Later virgins.
Is it too late to make a move?
storytime? 🥺
Basically this girl at work would come talk to me for no reason sometimes and I never really thought anything of it. One time she went to get coffee on her break and brought me some hot chocolate. One time she showed me gym pictures on her phone of I guess how good her booty looked from working out or whatever. I thought this was weird but she did indeed have a nice ass, I just didn’t want people to think I’m a weirdo so to me it was cringe as fuck. I think she straight up asked me out at least once but I remember always turning her down. One time she asked me if I wanted to go to an escape room with her and I turned her down because this would’ve involved driving across town in 5pm traffic, fuck that.
Adhd drugs are a hell of a drug. Looking back, she was kind of my type. I have so many more stories like this and they’re all just as cringe. I can’t help but wonder how my life would be different today if I hadn’t have spent my entire life so far fucking up every potential relationship.
sounds like autosm bro cheers I got it too
I know that this is a male pov but seriously that is also an L for the lady. Can’t be throwing hints and expect everyone to be Mr hint getter
Idk it’s not really a hint, that’s pretty direct. If I were her I’d assume I got rejected.
This is not direct at all though. Direct is “my shift is almost done, do you want to hang out later?”. Being direct means you do actually have to include saying what you want.
Yeah, even when you’re 99% sure the person is flirting with you, you gotta balance that with what might happen if you’re wrong.
Read the situation wrong and you could end up handcuffed on the sidewalk with pepper spray in your eyes.
Fuck that. If not being willing to take that risk means dying alone, I’ll choose the latter.
And what about from the woman’s perspective? Do you really want strange men making guesses about whether you’re flirting with them or not? Knowing exactly what could happen if the wrong guy gets the wrong idea and won’t take “no” for an answer?
I’m not trying to victim-blame or make excuses for anyone. But there’s nothing to win by playing these kinds of mind games, so what’s the fucking point?
What on earth are you talking about?
There’s nothing easier than just explicitly checking in whether you’ve read the signals correctly or not before making any creepy moves.
Tip #1 for flirting: Make sure that the other person has a very easy way out of anything they might not like. Then you know they’re enthusiastically consenting for whatever comes next.
I have been specifically and repeatedly told women at work don’t want flirting or any other interpersonal interactions. So that shit is shut completely off when in public.
And that’s absolutely true! Until the one time it’s not, and then it’s your fault for not knowing.
TBF, I normally go by “off limits unless they make an obvious move”.
Which the cashier definitely did. Of course, like the OP I wouldn’t realize it till later…
To be fair, it could have just as easily been:
“You know, my shift is almost over (so I really want to pack my shit and get out of here)” to which anon had a good response.
A friend once invited me to go watch a movie with her and a couple friends. When I arrived she told me that the others couldn’t make it and she offered me a cocktail. I accepted, watched the movie (on opposite ends of the sofa) and went home. A couple months later I found out that the others were never invited.
This might be more her fault than mine, though.
Sounds like she dodged a bullet there.
