the Super Bowl halftime show was pretty good, they should consider continuing the strategy of getting people who aren’t totally washed

  • Alice@beehaw.orgEnglish
    7·
    2 days ago

    I just feel emotionally fragile. My friend who told me we were through changed his mind and apologized. I understand what he’s going through because I’ve been there too, but I can’t shake the feeling everyone’s a step away from dropping me. He can apologize for shutting me down and explain how he actually meant it kindly, but I still feel like the most annoying person on the planet.

    I have a D&D game with a new group coming up, as well as a queer matchmaking event. The thought of both are making me kind of sick. I’ve had multiple friendships end in a slow drama spiral. I read so much about conflict resolution and de-escalation and still, I say my piece and the other person starts ranting about how much they hate themselves and how they shouldn’t be my friend.

    I just keep missing how my friend group used to be. After the vaccine became available in the US, we all took a big trip together and it was one of the nicest memories of my life. We talked about doing more trips in the future. Now I don’t know where I stand with any of them.

    I’ll probably suck it up but I’m tempted to cancel both events. I really want companionship but I can only imagine myself ruining people’s self esteem.

    • melp@beehaw.orgEnglish
      6·
      2 days ago

      Have you heard of 7 cups? It’s a lovely community for folks working on their mental health. I have two therapists and started medication now and it’s getting my mental state in line, finally. But before all of that I found 7 cups helpful. (https://www.7cups.com/)

      • ɔiƚoxɘup@beehaw.orgEnglish
        5·
        1 day ago

        I used to be a 7 cups listener. Their privacy policy is an atrocity. Be safe out there. Nothing on that platform is private.

        • melp@beehaw.orgEnglish
          4·
          1 day ago

          Oh yea - defo didn’t use my real identity. It’s an open group style participation. It was helpful for what it was.

          • ɔiƚoxɘup@beehaw.orgEnglish
            5·
            1 day ago

            Once I understood their policy, it gave me a distaste for the service. I’m glad it was helpful to you!

      • Alice@beehaw.orgEnglish
        6·
        2 days ago

        Thanks, I really appreciate the suggestion. Probably not necessary though as I’m actually on my third therapist. I’ve been trying to figure out what’s wrong with me for a long time. 😓

        • melp@beehaw.orgEnglish
          7·
          2 days ago

          Aww. Maybe it’s not “what’s wrong with you” and more what do you need to make coping in this world more manageable? That’s what it was for me, in a nutshell. Always happy to chat so you can message me anytime.

          • Alice@beehaw.orgEnglish
            5·
            1 day ago

            Thanks ❤️ I just don’t want to cope without close relationships, I guess, so I really want to know why I keep making people spiral.

            Sometimes I think it’s not me, it’s them… But it’s become so many of them.

            • rozwud@beehaw.orgEnglish
              3·
              10 hours ago

              I doubt that you are making people spiral. From what I’ve experienced and observed in my own life, I think people who are dealing with shit tend to attract other people who are dealing with similar shit. And sometimes, depending on how said people are dealing with their shit, everyone’s shit can start colliding and turn into a shit storm. It’s not one person’s fault, and all any individual can do is work on their own shit and go from there.

              • Pete Hahnloser@beehaw.orgEnglish
                2·
                4 hours ago

                I’ve found this to be the case over the years. If I’m in active alcoholism, that’s who I find, usw. “Broken” people seek out “broken” people, because what the normies are doing makes no sense at all.