Suck my entire dick. Y’all wrong.

  • Stamets@lemmy.worldOP
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    2 days ago

    I hate chocolate. I don’t want no fuckin chocolate randomly surprising me. It is evil and should be banished.

    Edit: Okay because apparently I need to literally spell this out for people for who cannot make the simple leap on their own…

    I do not buy chocolate ice cream. I buy vanilla ice cream. It comes in a cone. It is vanilla. There is vanilla. That’s it. Maybe peanuts. Then, suddenly, chocolate.

    Does that make more sense now? Jesus H. Christ.

    Edit 2: Downvote me all you want. I’m not trolling, y’all are either utterly fucking incapable of understanding the concept of VANILLA ICE-CREAM, y’all are trolling or you’re living on such a distant plane of reality that you’re inventing shit that I’ve done then your opinion is worthless to begin with.

    Have fun with the single brain cell amongst all of you and let me know whose turn it is tomorrow.

    • Kickforce@lemmy.wtf
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      20 hours ago

      The chocolate is part of the charm you infidel. If you don’t like it there are other ice cream products that don’t have chocolate. Don’t ruin our Cornetto.

      • Stamets@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 days ago

        Buys chocolate ice-cream

        Kind of a crazy assumption on your part that the dude who just finished saying he hates chocolate is buying chocolate ice cream. Like… how the fuck did you get to that conclusion?

        No dude. I buy vanilla ice cream. Vanilla ice cream that has peanuts on top and is in a cone. No chocolate except for the random plug of chocolate. I’m sorry. It’s totally on me for assuming that the logical leap between “Hate chocolate” and “not buying chocolate ice cream” was such an easy one. I will take greater care in future.

        • Morlark@feddit.uk
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          2 days ago

          The inside of the cone is coated in chocolate to prevent it from getting soggy from all the melted icecream. It tends to pool at the bottom because that’s how gravity works.

          There is no “random” plug of chocolate. It’s an inherent function of the product. No matter what the flavour of icecream is, the cone itself is inherently a chocolate product.

          So yes, you are, in fact, knowingly purchasing chocolate products, as evidenced by the fact that you’re currently complaining about all the chocolate in these cones that you keep purchasing. If you hate chocolate that much, then maybe just don’t buy it?

          This is entirely a problem of your own making. And people are correct in pointing out that your responses have been nothing but toxic.

        • CrazyHorse@lemmy.cafe
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          2 days ago

          If Cornetto is the best vanilla ice cream you can get, you might have a point. But both you and me know that’s not the case!

        • Aviandelight @mander.xyz
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          2 days ago

          I’m definitely team chocolate here but now I’m really curious. What else could be used to plug the cone instead of chocolate but still taste good with vanilla ice cream? Has any other company tried something other than chocolate?

      • Stamets@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 days ago

        I DON’T.

        I legitimately do not fucking understand how all of you went “Oh. He hates chocolate. He is clearly buying chocolate ice cream!” Like how the fuck did you get there?

    • grue@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Even the vanilla versions of those things have a chocolate shell coating on the top, not just inside the cone. You would’ve known what it was about way before you got to that last part.

      (If that isn’t true for the ones you buy, I want to know what weird, obscure brand you’re talking about.)


      To be fair, though, coating the cone with some other flavor (butterscotch, maybe) could be a neat idea.

      • brisk@aussie.zone
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        2 days ago

        Not where I am it doesn’t. No idea where OP is

        (Still has chocolate on top though)

    • AlexanderTheDead@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      Take a picture and show us what cones you bought so we can make fun of you more. If you refuse, you’ll get made fun of anyway because we will all assume you realized you were in the wrong.

    • nialv7@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Ok, you bought a Cornetto once and was surprised by chocolate. Surely you learned after the first time and can just stop buying it? Where’s this obsession coming from, why can’t you move on?

      • Stamets@lemmy.worldOP
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        2 days ago

        Trolling

        Right. I’m trolling to say that “I don’t like random chocolate in the vanilla ice cream cones that I buy.”

        Jesus Christ. You people are fucking hopeless.

    • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      I mean, if it’s always there, and you’re surprised to find it… maybe it is your braincells that are free roaming…