Sacre mille de tonnerre !

Btw the French writer Rabelais, through his character Gargantua has established that the neck of a well endowned goose is the best for wiping the arse:

there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose, that is well downed, if you hold her head betwixt your legs. And believe me therein upon mine honour, for you will thereby feel in your nockhole a most wonderful pleasure, both in regard of the softness of the said down and of the temporate heat of the goose, which is easily communicated to the bum-gut and the rest of the inwards, in so far as to come even to the regions of the heart and brains.