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I don’t even have an excuse. By every commonly accepted metric my life is great. I have a loving wife, and I love her. We are building a house. I have a decent job, and she makes even more than I do. Life is good in every measurable way.
I fucking hate it, and myself. I would have been perfectly content to just not wake up today. I have not been my own man for a decade and I am sick of breathing.
I’m not alone, I’m with family, but lonely in a crowd.
I think my mom just look at me as a failure
Because I have committed the sin of having this debuff called “depression”
The bad thing in his world is really just generation trauma
I mean, would the evil politicians thst we have today, would they even have been evil if they had a normal loving childhood?
Out world is literally just led by abused children that never grows up, and then they have children who they’ll abuse, so then the next generation will be like that again.
On the bright side, if what you do does not matter, then have fun with it?
We aren’t alone - history goes through cycles, and while we thought we were special, it turns out that we are not.
Things are going to change, and not all for the better - though not none either? We will endure. Find your way to cope.
Treading water. I’m high functioning as far as mental health stuff goes. Fortunately when I go to family events, I bring my laptop and my Switch, and of course I have my phone, and earphones, so I can zone out and tune stuff out if I need to.
At my age, holidays are for the children. I’ve seen so many of my family members I cared about pass on, and they made holidays fun for me when I was young, so it’s a bit depressing to think about them. So I try to make them as fun as I can for the kids, as long as I have the energy.
The magic of the holiday is made by us now.
Woke up early to go deal with the second snow storm in as many days at work, because I’m on call, because the supervisor let everyone else go on vacation and then quit. Merry Christmas
Oh ffs mate. How long did it take you to sort it?
I was there 3 hours, after my 14h stretch alone Tuesday night I was done. Surprisingly, my work bully saw me about to break and took the call phone and sent me home. Maybe we can turn over a new leaf, idk. I left a six pack in his truck before I left. It wouldn’t be this bad but our previous supervisor let 2 of 4 people take vacations out of state, then quit himself leaving us really understaffed.
I’m tired more than just physically.
Um, what if the holidays are hard for you because you are alone?
I’m here for ya.
Except you’re not.
Merry Christmas
@LadyButterfly Life has been pretty much the same lately, though I suppose the only real change is that I bought a motor yacht. Owning this yacht has sparked a new curiosity about the world, leading me to start understanding the full annual cost of running a motor yacht—a whole new realm I never had to think about before. And you know what? Yachts are actually pretty interesting.
https://www.yachttrading.com/yacht-encyclopedia/motor-yacht-annual-running-cost-breakdown-most-buyers-miss-933/That sounds really interesting! There’s a few people on Airbnb experiences that sell boat rides on their boats to cover the cost. They do really well
Merry Kissmyass.
