• barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
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    12 hours ago

    The head of Homeland SECURITY doesn’t have good enough security to keep her bag from being stolen?

    Probably stolen by a member of her own security detail.

    Fucking hilarious.

    • BobSentMe@lemm.ee
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      7 hours ago

      “Hey guys, can we turn off all the cameras so nobody sees the drug deal I’m trying to do?”

  • barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
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    12 hours ago

    More evidence that we are shifting from a Trickle Down Economy to a Robin Hood Economy (take from the rich, give to the poor).

    • barneypiccolo@lemm.ee
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      12 hours ago

      I once knew a rich guy who carried two envelopes in his suit pockets. One carried small bills for tips and such, and the other carried large bills because “you never know when you are going run across a good gun deal.”

  • collapse_already@lemmy.ml
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    15 hours ago

    Who goes out with $3k cash? Even if you are so wealthy that the quantity is like $20 for normal people, that’s enough to make you a target if someone discovers you have it.

    • peteyestee@feddit.org
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      13 hours ago

      That comedian… You know the one. The young Jerry Seinfeld… He did coke and then made a Netflix comedy show about doing coke.

    • jagged_circle@feddit.nl
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      12 hours ago

      Idk, one time I had $20k in cash. It happens.

      Typically when you’re moving money, such as buying or selling something.

      • collapse_already@lemmy.ml
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        8 hours ago

        I bet you didn’t casually leave it in your unattended bag. I paid $5k cash for a car once and planned that payment out carefully to minimize the time I had the money in hand.

        • Jumpingspiderman@lemmy.world
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          7 hours ago

          I once did some consulting for the IAEA in Vienna. They paid you in CASH at that time. As an American I felt really really uncomfortable walking around Vienna with 3-4k in my pocket. Austrians thought nothing of doing so.

  • Crikeste@lemm.ee
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    18 hours ago

    How the fuck is she going out in public and not being shot in the face? Honest question.

  • Boddhisatva@lemmy.world
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    22 hours ago

    If a black guy was pulled over with that much cash, the cops would civil forfeiture it because it is obviously proceeds from drug dealing.

    I trust they are now investigating her ties to the drug trade?

  • oyo@lemm.ee
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    18 hours ago

    Department of Handbag Security Chief Fails to Secure Handbag.

  • someguy3@lemmy.world
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    22 hours ago

    Everyone here focused on the cash for some reason.

    The thief got away with Noem’s driver’s license, medication, apartment keys, passport, DHS access badge, makeup bag, blank checks, and about $3,000 in cash, the law enforcement source said.

    The only saving grace is they can lock out that one badge. Hopefully she reported it quickly.

    • samus12345@lemm.ee
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      18 hours ago

      Hopefully she reported it quickly.

      Why? Any rando wandering in can’t be worse than the people who are already there.

      • VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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        16 hours ago

        I’m laughing at the idea of a hobo walking in smelling like piss and shit and wearing her badge, and staff going, “Morning Kristi!”.

    • dirthawker0@lemmy.world
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      21 hours ago

      Who the hell still carries around paper checks? I think I’ve written a total of 3 checks in the past 4-5 years, all for home service like plumbers.

      • MBech@feddit.dk
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        21 hours ago

        I’m european, born in the 90’s. I’ve never in my life seen a check in person… By the 00’s everyone either had a credit card or just used cash.

        • Damage@feddit.it
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          19 hours ago

          Italy here, I handled lots of those when I had a business dealing with other businesses. Never for personal stuff, for that I’d have a cashier’s check printed at the bank

      • itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml
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        20 hours ago

        Who the hell still carries around paper checks?

        Old people who wish to punish everyone else in line at the grocery store.

          • skulblaka@sh.itjust.works
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            12 hours ago

            I fix cars at a big retail chain and yep. There’s instant verification now where in order to accept it we have to punch all the info into some service on the POS computer to make sure the check clears, but if it does, yeah we take those. Money is money. Checks are still issued and cashed by banks so we still take em.

      • Podunk@lemmy.world
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        21 hours ago

        For me, I hand write checks weekly. That 3 percent credit card fee can add up quickly. Invoice me, and get the total payed at the end of the month. Also handy for person to person transactions, where cash is impractical.

        • JamesTBagg@lemmy.world
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          20 hours ago

          That’s why I pay my rent with check, hand delivered to their office. That 3% is a significant chunk of money.

            • andros_rex@lemmy.world
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              11 hours ago

              Landlords/management companies sometimes will try to make you go through a payment portal with a fee if you try to do direct debit.

              • mokoleus@lemmynsfw.com
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                2 hours ago

                The fuck!!! In canada I debit rent to my landlords email thru my bank, 0 fees… outside of the banks normal monthly ones of course. And all the cash apps in the US are so bizarre… like you can’t do any of that through your banks? Why even deal with one then?

        • Damage@feddit.it
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          19 hours ago

          Wait, you mean in your country it’s the consumer who pays the credit card fee?

      • klemptor@startrek.website
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        21 hours ago

        I do, they’re useful for tipping my hairdresser & the shampoo girl and I don’t want to remember to put one in my wallet each time, so I just keep a bunch in my wallet

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      15 hours ago

      That’s assuming she’s honest. There could just as easily have a USB stick with confidential docs in it

        • Auzy@aussie.zone
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          1 hour ago

          Sadly, you’re giving them too much credit.

          Don’t forget Trump is on tape giving away confidential information to reporters for free to make his dick seem bigger

          And here in Australia, one of our billionaires confirmed he also showed them confidential information about the submarines.

          And these are the cases we know about… There’s no chance the confidential docs at Mar a lago were safe… In fact, the only guarantee there was that there was no cameras installed in the bathrooms (which is likely why he did it)

      • VitoRobles@lemmy.today
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        16 hours ago

        There was a Twitter story where Elon fired so many Twitter folks that for a large window of time, a lot of things was available to the public because the person in charge was fired.

    • Admiral Patrick@dubvee.org
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      22 hours ago

      How could we forget about the makeup bag?

      Joke aside, the access badge can be revoked immediately (unless Elon somehow fucked that up too). Locks can be changed (and she can probably have that done quickly by a security detail as well as a sweep of the apartment). Blank checks can be canceled at the bank (basically a bulk stop payment on the range of check numbers).

      Passport may be a bigger concern, but for someone in a cabinet-level position, anyone attempting to use it would probably be questioned pretty thoroughly.

      • ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one
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        17 hours ago

        Joke aside, the access badge can be revoked immediately (unless Elon somehow fucked that up too).

        Elon Musky definitely fucked it up.

      • jaybone@lemmy.zip
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        20 hours ago

        She had a copy of The Epic of Gilgamesh on stone tablets she was reading.

    • Rhaedas@fedia.io
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      22 hours ago

      Shouldn’t have to remind them, it’s literally DHS, but hope they shut down that badge’s access.

    • Gina@lemmy.wtf
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      21 hours ago

      Most people would not have “quick” context for an “access badge”. But they do instantly understand “cash”.

  • Norgoroth@lemmy.world
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    20 hours ago

    Drug using dog killer obviously can’t be trusted, she was clearly on the way to buy more drugs. Lost more state secrets than Donald’s toilet library